I have to admit that I am not really a forgiving person, I tend to hold grudges and vindicate myself. But being a Christian, we are commanded to forgive others just like God forgave us. I know it’s difficult I’ve been struggling to forgive some people who have hurt me in the past and believe me it’s not that easy. I guess forgiveness is one of the most profound and most difficult teaching in the Bible.
How can we forgive someone who hurts us, who caused us so much pain. And ultimately how can you forgive someone who is not even asking for forgiveness. This morning when I was reading my devotion the bible clearly said “God will forgive you as you forgive others” Matthew 6:14-15 God really spoke to me through these words how can I be forgiven if I couldn’t do that myself. God extended His love for sinners like us and even if we hurt Him so much when we commit sins, He is always there to forgive us, that’s how much God loves us and as followers of Christ we must find it in our hearts as well to extend our love even to our enemies and try to forgive and forget.
This morning as I weigh myself I found out that I lost another three pounds, I don’t know if I really should be glad about losing weight because I feel more sick than ever now that I trimmed down. This is my dream and I used to try out a lot of weight losss supplements just to lose weight but with no luck. Now, that I finally have my dream it seems I’m not really happy about it.
Forgive me Lord for being too proud and for thinking I can manage without your help. I am sorry, Lord. Deep in my heart, I know there’s really only You I can turn for help and I pray that as always You will remain true to Your promises and help me.
People think that I am strong. I guess, part of it is true and I do have a high tolerance for pain. I don’t usually let other people know that I’m hurting and many times I do feel like giving up. Being sick with a chronic illness can sometimes be a test of faith and it amazes me how I survived going through this endless battle. I am not always strong, many times I fall into my knees and call for the one whom I draw my strength, my awesome God who never fails to rescue me and He always, always keeps His promise that He will never forsake me, and I stand by His Word. Praise be to God!
During my bible study last week, my cell group leader asked how our prayer time is and if we are spending time to speak and listen to God’s word. I have to admit that most of the time I pray as if I’m ought to go somewhere and usually I am. Sometimes I just don’t have the time and there’s just too many work to be done that I rush in prayer and I am so tired at night that I can’t bring myself to God longer. I know I’m not pleasing God, He wants me to find and spend more time with Him.
Why is it when we want something so bad from God we can pray all day until we get the answer we want? Why when things are not turning out okay, we pray as if there’s no tomorrow? But when things are just fine, we seem to have forgotten God. We must always pray fervently to Him and let our desires and praises reach Him at all times.
“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express”
Romans 8:26
The Lord hears good people when they cry out to Him, and He saves them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the broken-hearted , and He saves those whose spirits have been crushed.
Psalm 34:17-18
A few years back a friend gave me a book “Where is God when we hurt?” and I’m not really sure if I fully understood what the author meant but up to this date I am still wondering where is God when I’m hurting… I want to believe and I do believe that He’s there but what I would like to know is what he plans to do to stop me from hurting.
Many times we lose hope when the pain is too much to bear and no matter how strong you try to be sometimes you just want to scream and shout you give up, maybe then God will hear you. I don’t want to question God, I am putting all my trust in Him that He knows what I’m feeling and His doing something about it, and He alone can comfort me and His doing everything I can’t and soon things will get better… soon!
Now when the people saw that Moses was delayed coming down from the mountain, the people gathered together to Aaron, and said to him,
“Come, make us gods that shall go before us; for as for this Moses, the man who brought us out of the land of Egypt, we do not know what has become of him.” Exodus 32:1
Archibald Rutledge wrote that one day he met a man whose dog had just been killed in a forest fire. Heartbroken, the man explained to Rutledge how it happened. Because he worked outdoors, he often took his dog with him. That morning he left the animal in a clearing and gave him a command to stay and watch his lunch pail. A fire started in the woods, and soon the blaze spread to the spot where that dog had been left. But he didn’t move. He waited right where he was and perished.
The Israelite, on the other hand, quickly grew weary of waiting.
Moses had been gone only 40 days when they began to pressure Aaron to
find “gods” that could lead them into the Promised Land. Their only thought
was of the pleasures that awaited them in a land “flowing with milk and
honey.” They grew restless under the need to wait.
Christians face the same temptation. Often we are eager to get on with it. We have so much to do; so many tasks beckon us forward. We don’t want to sit and wait, so we lurch forward with gods of our own making. We use our own wisdom and strength to try to reach goals that only God is adequate to achieve.
If you find yourself straining to go forward when God doesn’t seem to be in a hurry, hold back and wait. Perhaps He has an entirely different plan for your life. Concentrate on what you must do now and let God move you ahead when the time is right.
“For I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11
It has been so long since I actually meditated on God’s words. I used to have a healthy spiritual life until that crisis that almost made me turn away from everything I believed in. But lucky me, for God didn’t let it happen, He didn’t let me totally slipped away. He was always there even when at times I don’t want Him to be. Its not easy to remain faithful when all the bad things happen to you and there comes a point in life that you seem to have everything you need but without God its seems hollow and useless. Deep inside me there’s a silent emptiness and longing for God and desperately wishing that I could bring back my relationship with Him.
When I got sick and committed my life to Him, I’ve always thought that I already knew what God wants me to do for my life.. I thought after finishing the “Purpose Driven Life” I actually found my purpose and that is to serve God with all my heart. And I did, just that. I thought I was pleasing God with what I’m doing not knowing that somehow I was only pleasing myself and trying to look good for others and forgetting the real essence of my commitment to God. I’ve learned a lot the past years, it was a difficult time and a test to my faith. It has been a struggle up to know to heal and forgive those who have wronged me but I know slowly God is working on me and someday when I’m ready He will let me know His plans for my life.
In the meantime, I’m trying to repair the broken relationships and patiently waiting on God. Waiting alone, is hard enough for me for I am very impatient. In fact most of my misfortunes are brought upon my impatience, poor decisions, stubborness and mistakenly thinking that this is what God wants yet it will turn out that I’m doing what I actually want. So now, I’m trying to be more patient and relying on God’s will and trusting that whatever comes my way as long as I have God in me, I need not to worry.
God wants us to feel that our way through life is rough and perplexing, so that we may learn thankfully to lean on Him. Therefore He takes steps to drive us out of self-confidence to trust in Himself, for the secret of the godly life is to wait on the Lord. - J.I. PACKER
Taken from my devotion this morning…
God never forsakes us (Hebrews 3:5): Even if our brokenness is our own making. God is still kind and merciful, and always on our side. He is present in the midst of all circumstances.
I have been faced with difficult and tough times before, many times I am always at fault and I feel that I bring trouble to myself. But looking back, those circumstances had made me strong and it has proven how God loves me so much that He is able to accept and forgive me no matter what. There was never a time that God had forsaken me… He was always there, even if I’m not always there for Him. God had helped me and lifted me up in my most trying times and He had blessed me in so many amazing ways.
Now, that I am once again in one of the most difficult circumstance in my life, I am standing firm and holding on to His promises…
